Many family problems fester because they go ignored or are not handled with appropriate remedies. Counselors can assist family members in identifying their concerns, thoughts, and feelings in a way that could be perceived as vengeful or going behind another’s back in another context. This form of open conversation is beneficial in bringing a family together over fundamental flaws and beginning to build on strengths. Establishing (and maintaining) group respect for all persons’ thoughts and feelings produces a counseling atmosphere that aids therapy progress and allows families to come to grips with their challenges.
Remember to think about emotions in the context of dynamics.
It’s not always difficult to discern how one client feels in respect to another family member. Anger and distrust (and other emotions) show up in obvious ways. Even though family members try to hide their emotions, they frequently give themselves up in the process. It is critical to recognize that how clients feel on the inside does not tell the whole story of how their families are affected. Interactions between a son and his father, a mother and her daughter, or a husband and wife can serve as more accurate barometers of difficulties that need to be addressed. If they are informed, people are aware when they have made a mistake. When you’re subjected to the silent treatment, it’s more difficult to figure out what the real problem is. When it comes to improving family functioning, it is typically the behavior that has to be addressed rather than the feelings that these behaviors produce.
Allow for pauses and disagreements.
Arguments may appear to be counterproductive to healthy expression, but they can be the most open and honest method of communication amongst families. A counselor’s first instinct to a disturbance or interruption may be to instantly tamp it down in order to keep control of the room, but allowing these encounters to run their course can result in illuminating peeks into family dynamics. When unrehearsed interruptions in conversation occur, pretenses and shields are frequently cast away, and witnessing how each family member reacts to the interruption can assist counselors better grasp the situation.
Counselors must be prepared to intervene if the tangent ceases to be beneficial and begins to be harmful. Counselors may be required to take sides in order to prevent one family member from berating another. Arguments and interruptions in a controlled situation where counselors can clearly see dynamics are useful therapy tools, but counselors must stop threads of debate that meander into personal assaults or even violence.
Don’t overlook the need for proper training.
As proven, counseling families necessitates professionals using complex approaches. It also indicates that counselors who want to work with families should consider becoming certified as a family counselor. Obtaining such status usually necessitates specialized training as well as supervised sessions. According to the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, counselors must complete a term of supervised clinical practice (typically two years) after graduating from a recognized program before being licensed or certified.
Even when counselors have such credentials and expertise, some family circumstances may push them past their professional limits. This is common when a counselor encounters a family struggling with abuse (sexual, physical, mental, etc.). Such instances, such as court-supervised appointments, necessitate extremely strict preparation and parameters. Though counselors surely want to assist every client and family, they must occasionally take the difficult step of acknowledging that certain types of families require specialized assistance and may benefit from a referral.